Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
I was galloping around pretending to give birth to pbrs. I could have used a mask.
He wants to buy me a drink to apologize for sending me a pic of his dick. Welcome to my life.
It's 1pm, she's in the shower, I don't have the guts tell her I wasn't her blind date. Someone got stood up.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
have fuck
*fun
actually forget it have a fuck too it'll do you good
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
