my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
so i had a choice between studying for my physics test on fluid dynamics or spend the night with my girlfriend. hello doubletasking.
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
I want a meaningful relationship and i wont get one if i keep giving him blow jobs in my basement while watching family guy.
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Just realized that I bailed on you guys yesterday just so I could get wendy's. it was worth it but still, sorry
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
Randomize
