I could write a book called "things that come out of my vagina"
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
is it sad that i can describe this night as "the night that i was sober" and we all know which night it was. like literally one night of sobriety.
chugging beers on the train. people are staring. I would be offended if it wasn't 8:30
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
man fuck you i am a delight. you're the one who fucking set his tree on fire while high
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
