I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Holy shit he's circumcised. His parents must have really loved him.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
Whoever put the life size cut out of Snoop Dog next to me in bed understands me.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
