I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
i must of done something right to please the booty call gods. . . maybe fucking that fat chick?
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
Did you seriously take investment advice from our coke dealer?
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
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