batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
I'm not sure if what i'm hearing downstairs is sex or not, but if it is, it sounds like there's a dog involved...i'm mildly concerned.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
casually drinking alone with your cats. do they like sparks?
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
May or may not have been going down the road shooting fireworks.
alright well Taco Bell Closes at 12 so you better pray to god she's asleep by then or I'm running in your house butt ass naked with a bag of tacos
My legs feel like baby dolphins
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
My vagina likes him more than I do, but I’m going to follow her lead and see what happens
Randomize
