just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
woke up to 35 texts all saying im cheating on her
me and last nights hook up spent two hr. figuring out a reply we went with i love you..
I mean this holiday was built on cheap beer, shitty whisky, and processed meat... and I fully plan to honor that
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
The guy I screamed at across the bar for booing the Bruins ended up buying me shots I had to explain to him there's not a chance in hell I would ever fuck a Canadian! #Bostonstrong
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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