If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
I'll just give him your contact info, and you'll somehow manage to get laid. Which will make me feel like your vagina's agent or something.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize
