Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
Do you want the good news or bad news first?
bad news
The bad news is i thew up on your bed, the good news is i found out who ate your cheetos.
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
Is it just me or do I always seem to have cum in my bellybutton?
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
We've done the math and the dogs tails are wagging at a rate of 3000 wags per hour. Stoned.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
do not get into a discussion with my roommate when im sitting there naked ever again.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
She told me about it right after. She said she was scared I would be disappointed. And I was, but I pretended not to be. Which pretty much sums up our relationship.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
No dude shes like 5 feet tall and maybe 100 pounds... Normally i wouldnt be scared but someone gave her a bat. Thats why im in the bathroom
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