Our relationship is like that beach boys song "help me Rhonda" and I'm fucking Rhonda. And Rhondas's the whore in case you've never heard it.
next time the cops show up in riot gear we should probably leave
and miss being on the news....no way
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I raided the fridge drunk the same time dad was eating breakfast
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I think I fell in love with her when I saw her kick a freshman in the chest
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
I threw up in the shower. I cleaned it all up and there is on mess at all. This hangover has become borderline religous. Powerful and life changing.
You were giving me all the reasons why being the big spoon is such a responsibility, and how you wish you were a girl cause the little spoon does nothing
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
