I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
he was sending me dirty texts but i was watchin nickeloden and couldnt get into it
im ashamed your my cousin
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
He painted his chest for the game... I just fucked an exclamation point.
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
Just had an old man tip me two dollars and say "here put this in your baby fund, you'll have a baby someday" I swear this is gods way of saying GET ON BIRTH CONTROL NOW!
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
Randomize