Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Dude.. full face helmets and hangovers do not mix... I am never going to get rid of the smell of puke.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
COCAINE IS GR8
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
