I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
you win again, gameday.
hungover + watching bobsledding = i just puked
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
Next thing I know we're all standing in the kitchen holding hands and thanking God for the beer.
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
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