The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
I'm naked in the window of the hotel and I feel like I'm walking in slow motion like a robot
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
That one life defining moment when you catch yourself pouring whisky into your hot chocolate at 4 am, whilst crying and talking to your dog.
I'd like to bring you 40 virgins and treasure chests of gold to make you feel better
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Cheez-its and a bottle of cab...for under $10 you could win this girls heart
Did we pole dance in front of my boss last night or was it just me?
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Randomize