i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
I STRONGLY considered not bringing that guy home with me last night simply because I'd JUST changed my sheets that morning.
Just stole a goat. Bringing it to your house to cock block. Blame the goat not me.
He just stared me dead in the eye as he continued to beat off. Then said "you were going to catch me sooner or later".
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
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