he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I bought new panties to console myself ... you know, because I am going to lose my ovaries. Well, if I don't die of a heart attack first. But at least when the EMS folks find me, I'll be finely dressed from the waist down.
Any residual attraction has just been ruthlessly murdered by that mustache.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
being serenaded is actually kind of awkward 2/10 do not reccommend
The only thing about him that I appreciated was that he destroyed the bathroom at your birthday and missed singing to you. And we all knew.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Randomize