what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
I showed my boss the "She Wolf" video. He sent it to all his friends and told me to make us martinis...thanks Shakira and keep it up
college drinking is stealing all my money, thank god planned parenthood is somewhat free
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
GIIIIRL I AM STONED AF AND I HAVE A HOMEMADE POT PIE IN THE OVEN THIS PARTY IS LIT.
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize