Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
We had to coat check the pizza.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I'm just going to eat until there's an actual reason why he wouldn't want to fuck me.
Gas station champagne. And before you say anything I'll have you know it's imported. From California. So get fucked.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
i just watched a 7 minute video on people making a hot air balloon for their dog and i am a changed person
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
Randomize