We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
Just toasted a glass of brandy with my own reflection to my dimples. Why are you not here?
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
just because you are in college doesnt mean its okay to pregame easter mass.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
He asked me to coffee and I had no choice but to be honest. So naturally I told him that sobriety and monogomy are not two of my strong suits.
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
During your work shift I was either: a) stoned. b) high. c)stoned. or d) high.
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Randomize
