Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
The last thing I remember is goading each other into a vodka-chugging competition.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
It's such a sad loss when a hot guy finds Jesus and grows a neckbeard
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
Joke’s on you. I got to talk to a furry about why nukes are bad and why musicals are good.
Randomize
