So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I hate to say it, but I think my pandora being Marvin Gaye love songs was the prime reason for the bj last night
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Synchronized big wheels back flips off the second floor roof. Good idea or great idea?
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Did I mention I hooked up with another country star? I think I need some sort of trophy for each time, yah know? Or like a sash and I win a badge or patch for each person. Like a slutty Girl Scout.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
If I hear you use the phrase "silky soft scrotum" one more time I swear to God you'll regret it
ok first of all what the fuck
Ok, there are marshmallows shaped like elephants
Randomize
