i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Need toilet paper. Napkins suck. Slowly running out of those two and the bleeding hasn't stopped. Your cat is next
I'm mentally preparing my vagina for this semester. It's fucking welcome week. I'm going to be talking to her all night.
I'm not drinking cause I'm like 4 vodkas away from a boom box and Peter Gabriel.
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
I told her my blood type was O Positive and we started making out. Bio majors are weird.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Randomize
