Gte hit a new low, I took a poopnap, passed out mid poop on the toilet.
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
I swear if she asks me for a baby one more time I'm gonna sleep with one of her friends
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
If I get over there and the april fools joke is that there's no HBO, I'm setting fire to the place.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
He made me twerk for scrambled eggs... I regret nothing
Also, I called my liver hardcore in front of vet students last night and then wound up having three of them trying to palpate it. So...not saying that again.
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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