I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
5 seconds ago I had no idea that a fart could travel so fastly thru the tanning bed. I taste it in the back of my neck.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Man, I'm never going tanning again he noticed the burns on my ass
Randomize
