I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
Fuck I am starving. I don't think I've eaten in the past two days.
You didnt need to. Gin is like eggs, its a perfectly nutrionally balanced meal.
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
Nothing motivates a person to clean their apartment like puking up cheese ravioli beer-tequila chicken wings for eight hours.
He thought you were kidding about me peeing on my ex...and then I was like "that was one time"
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
the next morning we realized we didnt speak the same language... guess i subconsciously did learn a little german last semester. thanks study abroad.
ah the experiences a semester in Vienna can give you. Frau would enjoy knowing that even while sleeping during class you still managed to learn enough german to get laid
The bouncer just called me magically delicious... apparently I'm a lucky charm. hollllleeeerrrr!
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