i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
Ok cool. Ill pick up liquor because, well let's be honest, we don't need an excuse anymore.
my fake id says im a 34 yr old russian lady ... how is this working
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
I think that's mostly how we became friends.
Well that, and your desire to put your penis in me.
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
I think the moment I knew you were going to black out was when I told you how many shots you had already and you were shocked and then poured another one
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
I WOULD SERIOUSLY RECOMMEND THE SHIT THAT I AM ON RIGHT NOW
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Randomize
