Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
but she was nice to me.
She was a fuckin STRIPPER.
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
It would be one hovered percent delicioui
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
We should probably feel disgusted that we took turns eating and drunkenly passing around a burrito the size of a small dog but i’m ok with it.
He texted me at 4:30 in the morning saying "I'm not drunk but I think you're beautiful" and then a facebook message at 6 am saying "hi" and the subject was "oh"
Oh no...did you put star fish over your nipples again?
Don't send me pics of cunning dicks while I'm eating potato chips
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
Randomize
