I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
Im organizing a group to help fondle my shoe. Too many shots dude. Too many.
he told me he could still feel the blowjob i gave him last year
wow. THAT good huh
How the fuck you gonna play love don't cost a thing in a strip club?
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
Is it acceptable to bring pot to a funeral or am I going to have to do this shit sober?
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Stop saving videos when you’re using my pornhub account!!! My girlfriend just tried to finger my butt because she thinks I’m into that
Randomize
