i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
My chin is breaking out a bit and feels all itchy and burny like I'm allergic to something. Are you using a new lotion on your balls?
Just blowing bubbles with my nipple rings in my shower.
You always make things weird.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
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