We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
It's Monday. What a great day to start the weekend on the week of st. Patricks day
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I didn't even realize you were getting that drunk until bam!
is bam when I fell down the stairs or when I threw up standing at the bar?
I fed the cats at 7 am, made her eggs, gave her oral, and now I'm helping her clean and baking her brownies. Cosmos got nothing on me.
Your penis has nothing to do with my throat infection, sorry...
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Sooo the theme of my 21st is rapidly becoming Gay Mexico
If the world ends now I want you to know I was on my favorite toilet fighting the good fight.
The packers need to win more often, Andrew keeps drunk calling me and confessing his undying love for me in between puking and taking more shots.
WHAT KIND OF SELF RESPECTING 28 YEAR OLD WOMAN WAKES UP IN A FRAT HOUSE?!?'
The cougar kind?
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
