i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
i was picked up off the floor by a stripper, if thats not a new life low then i dont know what is.
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
Yes I slept with him, he was the only one not wearing a costume. Guys with costumes are just trying to impress you.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
Kinda thinking about going to my moms wedding high
The last time I was on vacation the pandemic blew up. Can't wait to see how my vacation fucks up the world this time.
Randomize
