my head looks like a cockatoo
mine looks like a lions mane...looks like the entire zoo is going to prom
I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
This creepy guy was following me and i hid in the bushes. i could say i was high as an excuse but honestly it was straight up fun.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
She called to say she's single and blow job season is back.
Ummmm you know you're drinking vodka out of a Skittles bag, right?
There is a 97.5% chance that my sketchy roommate is also a hooker.
So when can I meet her?
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Woke up with a grilled cheese in my hand, it was like god giving me a high five for the night before
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
I did not marry a roomba.
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