Pete just told the whole party I'm a squirter
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
do you actually have a paper bowl full of broken glass and ecstasy or was that just a dream?
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
Bud light lime after 12 shots of vladdy is like frolickin in a meadow of sweet flavor
I also think about what hot dudes penises are gonna look like when theyre 80 and it's not pretty
You texted me a picture of your face along with #help
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
You were yelling at the mannequin and saying "DON'T LOOK AT ME"
I have a cat for love and a booty call for sex. What else could I need?
As in, legitimately worried. You just sent me a 6 message long text that did not contain any complete words.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
