We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
So, your gf couldn't walk up the stairs without your help, but she could knit you a scarf?
I think the fact that the scarf was made out of dental floss should be taken into account.
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
It's only Tuesday and I just measured and checked to see if my 6'5 Friday booty call will fit in the back of my jeep comfortably.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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