Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
You poured sparks in your panties and NOW you're wondering why you have a UTI?
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I am NOT getting arrested in a wig.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Although I feel like awkward kinda describes your entire sexual history...
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Oh dear. Sending much love.
Just send a machete.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
