it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
I seriously had to check my phone this morning to make sure I didn't agree to any strange sexual favors.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
You said "bag of dicks" before passing out and falling off the landing
Oh god... Please tell me Sarah didn't see me like this
...you may have kinda punched her in the tit on the way down...
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
It's election day and I was just tied up with an American flag scarf
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
There's a video of you almost falling asleep in a bar stool listening to Jimmy Buffett. Nekkid.
Randomize
