Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
I need to shower. I still have paint on me from the homeless guys
Well we didn't hook up. Maybe from his girlfriend's point of view, but not mine.
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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