what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
We walked in and found his glass coffee table broken and you in the bathroom throwing up saying "What a bad first impression."
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
If I don't have the money by then, I'll pay you in sex.
It's going to be 23.5 times of sex and 19 blow jobs. I just googled it.
I can't finger myself when I'm all distracted about whether or not your family is going to like me
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I had a dream I got back with Amanda. And then cheated on her the same day. Even my conscious is a dick
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
Right in the middle of our simultaneous orgasms, he shouted "HAPPY NEW YEAR" ruining the intimacy
We had sex on a couch that was held together by Velcro. Want to know an unsexy sound? Velcro ripping apart under your bare ass.
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