You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Just did coke off of a cross necklace and am headed to the strip club. Happy Easter!
WAKE UP!!! We have 20 minutes to get to class. That means we only have 10 minutes to get drunk.
It's kind of awesome I can smoke with my parents and tell them about thetime we used listerine in that bong
You slept on a pillow of digiorno
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
I don't know where I keep finding these guys, but mi power bottoms es su power bottoms.
I might be a bit late, couldn't find my pants and had to go to the police station. Unrelated
Randomize