remember about an hour ago when i told you i was never drinking again? i may or may not be mixing malibu with caprisun. just saying.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I'm going to listen to christmas music to trick my body into cooling off.
i really appreciated the lovely drunk rendition of whitney houstan's "i wanna dance with somebody" you left on my voicemail.
Go ahead. I tried to back up ur budhism story but she mite be catching on
Dammit. I hoped that would work. Just tell her I'm doing my pilgrmidge to Nepal or something.
Learned my lesson. Pink pantydroppers out of a beer bong=deceiving
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
You sent me a pic of you peeing in two separate directions
and like half a dozen dick pics
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