there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
Remember when we were trying to guess how many people could fit in my shower? The answer is 7
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
i had to cut you off after you shoved a bunch of bottle caps in your mouth and pretended you had braces.
We just found a knife wedged in between the cushions on the couch you guys fucked on...why is this?
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
She made me pour olive oil on her.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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