Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
You want to move to a city because of their promotional beer pricing
So?
This is why you shouldn't make decisions
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
My dad just sent me a text reminding me to bring the family beer pong championship belt. Thanksgiving 2012 just got real
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
Landen experienced Greenville for the first time last night. He was awaken by 2 cops and 4 EMS guys this morning in the bed of that truck that is for sale at the swashbuckler carwash, said he was trying to walk to waffle house... Greenville- 1, Landen- 0
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
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