My mouth tastes like defeat. Did he at least have money?
I told my ex i loved him and then he sent me a picture of this girl laying on his bed.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
i took a magical journey through the park for about two hours. it was amazing and everything was fantastical. i have been informed someone babysat me through that shit.
i know it looks like there's pee in the mayo jar in the fridge but i promise it's just apple juice that wouldn't fit in the jug after i added the booze.
However, you did manage to order seven different drinks while fingering her at the packed bar - it was like watching the pizza men pound the dough in the windows
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
Decisions were made. The quality of them will be judged tomorrow
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
