I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
It's like those toothpaste commercials where 4 out of 5 dentists would recommend your vagina
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
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