there is this woman at the counter who looks identical to linda ellerbee. and she's grinning. COME. INSIDE. NOW.
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
I just bought a handle of tequila and a breakfast burrito. I might be out of money for the weekend, but at least I have the necessities covered.
Randomize
