I just met lou reed's venus in furs. Her hands are slippery.
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
Like I couldn't describe it to you but if they did a lineup of penises i'd be able to pick it out.
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
Any clothing i put on is too many clothes.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
Also bring a pizza or no entry to my vagina OR the fort.
Cheese only
Who knew wearing a toga outside would provide for and infinite amount of dick to choose fron
I thought I was really making her scream. Turns out she had a Lego jammed in her lower back.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize