Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
So she farted while we were having sex but I was afraid she would stop because she was emberessed so i just went ahead and took the blame and apologized
i'm going to be honest, my vagina smells.
so, the parking garage attendent caught us humping in the car. long story short, we have free parking whenever we want! take that abstinence.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
he started drinking at 9am with grey goose and pancakes. He IS my hero.
my goal is to masturbate without thinking about my exbf.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
hey, cheif big dick, where the fuck are my panties.
She yelled Carpe Diem when she orgasmed. Is it too early to marry her?
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