he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
my phone calendar just alerted me that it's "weed time" in 15 minutes. do not remember setting that alert last night...
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
You know.... I ordered the nipple clamps when I was drunk. But on further consideration, THANKS DRUNK ME I LIKE WHATS HAPPENING
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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