She has an incinerator in her basement. Have you ever incinerated used condoms?
Lmao what?
It's a yes or no question.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
I think god invented us with two hands so we can grab an ass and spank it at the same time.
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
I could be the Kenny Powers of Sex Therapists.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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