i just spent an hour trying to convince my blind date that star wars is better than star trek. help me
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
Try and take me seriously and don't look directly at my hair or the jizz on my pants.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
Nothing with ever convince me that she wasnt purposely left behind by our mother to ruin my life and fuck our family
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
getting busted for public urination is like, a step above j-walking. you'll be fine
I'm sorry, I'm tired, I can't play long distance cockblock anymore. Good night don't get too pregnant.
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize
